Addictions - Not Always Noticed

Dogs in my Life

(these are my babies far left is Lexie, top left is Frankie and to the right is Nala)

As a child you see puppies and you immediately want one especially when they run to you all clumsy and they start licking your face.  We get giggly and start falling in love with these adorable creatures that just was attracted to you in seconds it feels as though you created a special bond.  Then comes the playing with them, you start with rough housing, then comes the hugging and then just being still while petting them.  They follow you everywhere to see what the next adventure will be, for all they desire is your time and love.  From the moment you walk into the door, they are ready to give you all the love and attention you want.  There is no other being that will offer you that in this world!

When I was around 10-11 years old, my father let me have a puppy form our neighbors' dog's litter, it was a male mutt breed the mother was a small indoor dog and I thought mine would be too.  My parents told me differently, I wasn't even allowed to keep in him in the backyard because they didn't want a mess back there so I had to keep him tied to the metal frame in our carport.  Not happy about that but as a kid you are excited to have a puppy so I agreed, my puppy was gone in a matter of a few weeks.  I searched the neighborhood but no one saw him.  I started crying and my dad had told me we should not cry for animals those tears are for humans that we lose not a dog.  But a child does not understand that concept, honestly I still don't understand or agree with that, a loss is a loss no matter if human or your pet.  This is the main reason my dad didn't want us to have a dog for he knew we would get attach to them and if we lose them by death it was something he didn't want us to experience at such a young age.  In his opinion it was an unnecessary pain, I have a different view for not only does the joy and love you receive outweighs the pain you go through from losing them, for children it prepares them for the natural process in life.  Every being has their time and they will eventually have to leave us, but the most important thing to learn is the memories you develop  and we must always appreciate the time we have with them.  

Years later we were surprised when our parents told us we were getting a puppy and they took us to the house of his co-worker who's dog had a liter.  She showed us the one that will be ours and we got the chance to play with him.  He was a black and white Collie and reminded us of "Lassie" but we felt he was more beautiful with being different then the regular colored collie.  My dad wanted to call him "Beuti" which means beautiful in Spanish and it was the name of his dog he had as a boy in Cuba.  He had the misfortune of seeing his dog killed by the neighborhood due to having rabies, so he suffered a lot with that loss and never wanted another dog.  This decision was a difficult one for him taking a chance on a pet for the entire family but one that I was glad he did, for we all bonded with this dog.  Unfortunately we only had him for 3-4 years for he ran away two times, the first he was able to escape finding his way back home but wounded and with a broken tooth, the second time we were not so lucky we searched but couldn't find him and then we received his collar in the mail with a note that he was hit by a car.  We all were devastated and us kids cried for the lose of our beautiful dog, my eldest brother for some reason didn't believe that, he felt the person kept him and wanted to search for him.  A few years later he actually thought he saw him, I don't remember for sure if the dog was lose or in a fence but my brother tried to approach him and called out "Beuti" and he told me the dog turned and stared at him but then went back to what he was doing, even though the dog turned he had a strong feeling that it was him.  

Around 30 years later my father and me were talking about the past and I had talked to him about our family dog "Beuti" that beautiful collie we had and the return home journey that he had and how unfortunate that he escaped again cause I thought for sure that there was measures taken to make sure he didn't escape again.  My dad told me well that he really didn't escape he had taken him in the car and went to someone he knew and gave him the dog but told them he had to take the collar cause he will tell us he was hit by a car.  My dad then told me that he thought we had figured it out.  I was extremely upset and told him very harshly "of course I would never think you would do something like that, it was not a decent thing to do.  That should of been a family discussion not you deceiving to us all that time".  He felt bad about the fact that we took it so hard but at the time he felt he was doing the right thing and giving him to a better home where he had a  dog  companion and thinking it was better that we thought he was gone.  As parents you do your best to make the right choices for your kids well being but what may seem like the right choice can actually be the most damaging one.  For us we felt that our dog didn't want to be with us for he ran away again and then getting the note with the collar saying he was killed, we felt we didn't take care of him enough.  When you form a bond with a pet even at a young age the truth is always better then a lie, the cycle of life should not be masked for children are stronger emotionally then we think they are.  Be there for them to help them handle the grief instead of sheltering them and keeping them in a bubble for sooner or later they will have to deal with the truth and it really only gets harder as we get older.

The first dog I had on my own was in my first marriage that my ex-husband gave me a dog he found at the Humane Society, he was a male Shiatsu with white, carmel and greyish black coloring.  He was around 8 months old and his name was "Jeffrey".  When I got divorced and moved back with my parents they didn't want him inside the house so I had to keep him outside which he did have a nice dog house and free range of the cemented yard.  Three years later I moved out to my own apartment and the owner was a friend of a friend and he agreed to let me have my dog indoors as long as there were no damages.  The very first day I had him he escaped from a make shift gate and tore 2 of the brand new blinds.  The first mistake I made was to tell my parents about it and they told me to get rid of him for it was better then to be kicked out.  It broke my heart but he wasn't behaving and I didn't know what else to do, my parents wouldn't agree to keep him while I was at work and my friend's yard was to dangerous for him.  A co-worker told me he has a female Shiatsu and he was looking for a companion for her and he said I can visit him anytime I wanted.  So I made a hasty decision which I felt would be a better choice for him, so I gave him up.  I wasn't there the day he picked"Jeffrey" up at my parents house for I knew I wasn't going to be able to do it.  My heart broke in pieces for it was not an easy choice to make and I would never repeat that choice again, I know people who made those choices and they felt the same pain of extreme loss and guilt.  So if you have to make this choice please think of all the alternatives and see what your real options are and if it is one that you really feel positive about.  c

Two years later I was given a wonderful gift of seeing my puppy being born for his mom was my brother's dog.  He was the 3rd born and he was exactly how I pictured him to be.  I took him over to my apartment next to my brother's when he was three months old and I called him "Button" he has been so far the only dog that I have named.  He was perfect to me, I loved his personality, his looks and we had an immediate connection.  He came into this world fighting for his life for he was born breached so we had to help his mom with his birth and he barely made it.  Then at 4 weeks old he got into his mother's dry food and he was choking, the next door neighbor came by and was able to help him to lodge the food from his throat.  Then at 8 months old he was almost attacked by a full grown male husky that belonged to my brother's friend that they let loose outside without watching him and I didn't know he was there but luckily I was able to pick "Button" up immediately and banged on my brother's door to get the dog inside.  I knew I could survive the bite but my dog would not he was only like 6-7 pounds a very small dog.  Then when he was 12 years old he was hit by a moving vehicle and we rushed him to the animal emergency room, he was in intensive care for up to 6-7 days.  With therapy and care he was running like normal within 4-5 months from the accident.  His determination was what helped him survive and recover as well as he did.  When Button was 18 months old I was given a beautiful poodle-cocker-terrier mix female puppy named "Luna" she was 3-1/2 months old, all black except a white splash on her chest that is why the previous owners called her Luna which means Moon in Spanish.  When I went to pick her up from my co-workers home she was in a shed they kept her in there due that the daughters did not potty train her and my co-worker working long hours had to keep picking up the accidents, so she decided to give her to me.  I jumped at the chance having a feeling she was going to be a good fit and boy was I right their personalities blended perfectly that when I lost my girl 11 years later "Button" only lasted 6 months after her death.  They both were such a joy and taught me so many lessons that the memories are worth the pain of their loss.  

There has been such great sayings I have heard through out the years about dogs and here are two of my favorites; "Dog is God spelled backwards" and "Dogs pick you, you don't pick them".  Those statements are so true, if you are a dog lover this will make so much sense to you.  First dogs are always there to be by your side as long as you let them even when they pass they are like your pet angel still guarding you, just like God does.  Second they connect with you because they do actually pick you, even cats do as well.  They come into your life for a reason, to help you feel perfect even when you don't think you are, to make you feel lovable even when you don't feel you are, to comfort you when you don't think anyone cares and to let you know you matter with every way of their tail.  There is no other pet that will greet you like your dog, to give you that warm beautiful feeling of being home.  If you hurt them (even those mean crazy people who do it on purpose-strongly dislike them they should all be punished!) they will not only forgive you but even try to save you if you are in danger.  They will give their life up for you to save yours, and even when they are dieing, they still try to comfort you.  There is no better being on earth, in my opinion, that shows us a glimpse of what God's beautiful divinity is all about. The pain is there when they have to part and end their journey with us but that sorrow is worth having for the wonderful experiences you are granted with them. Enjoying how they live in the moment, every moment they cherish just to be with you, no judgment, no games, no expectations, no opinions, no debts or markers on who gives more, no hatred, no arguments, etc.... all there is ..is just"pure unconditional LOVE".

My life is full and for some reason God has blessed me with 3 wonderful beautiful dogs and 2 adorable cats!  It does get crazy at times and don't know why it happened the way it has, for only two of them is what I had planned and desired but the other three happened, so I went with the flow and trusted that God must have his reasons why!  Do have to admit they sure make life challenging and it's never boring in my home and most of the time it's just lots, lots and lots of LOVE!  Some may think am crazy for trusting that this was a Divine plan and that's fine, but for me there are 5 beautiful beings that were entrusted to me as well as they are here to teach and protect me.

Blessings and may you find your peaceful journey with a furry friend!

**Please consider adopting an animal first so check the shelters you may find the "Love of your Life"       there.